Financial Reprieve for Americans who Still Hunger for the Luxury of Dining Out...

...and have an unrefined palate.

Menu Suggestion: The Five-Dollar Too Big to Fail Thick and Juicy Steak.

In case you can't watch this at work or something, the Wall Street dramz has trickled all the way down to a Denny's commercial. Specifically, Denny's says it's going to bail you out (because the government won't) with its "$4 Weekday Express Slam" breakfast.

Ha!

Instead of William Sonoma cupcakes, maybe that's one of the things Oprah will be giving away this year.

The Saddest Pharmaceutical Drug Commercial I've Ever Seen!

Man this Aricept commercial makes me hope I never get Alzheimer's.



"I'm Amy, grandpa."

And that part when he spaces out and just stares at the lagoon.

Update: A YouTube-er actually did a pretty funny "What were they thinking?" version of this commercial.

Tallulah Willis Wants Your Soul

Muh ha ha ha.

Okay so this is really mean, but this blurry-ass picture of Tallulah Willis and Demi Moore (leaving a doctor's office on Tuesday) freaks me out! It makes Willis look like (the original) Damien Thorn or an angry gargoyle or one of those creepy cartoon people from the Soy Joy commercials... or something. (Blame the blur.)

So it's clear, I'm not saying Willis is ugly.

Images via All Celebrity Pics.

P.S. And YouTube commenter ilovegoogle11 is right. The cartoon dog in this Soy Joy commercial totally humps the tree (about 10 seconds in).

Eva Mendes's Nipple Baring CK Commercial

Actress Eva Mendes, 34, is on a boob baring barrage...or something. First she did that racy ad for PETA (which actually showcased her crack; but also featured a smidge of side boob). Then she went all out in the May issue of Vogue Italia. And now she's in this commercial for Calvin Klein's Secret Obsession, which, thanks to a brief cameo made by Mendes's nipple, you won't be seeing on TV in the U.S. (not the uncensored version anyway).



Image via Arrebatadora.

Homophobic Snickers Commercial feat. Mr. T

U.S.-based candy maker Mars says it is pulling a Snickers television advertisement in the United Kingdom that prompted a complaint from a gay rights group.

This is the second time it's had to do this.

Last year some of the geighs had their panties in a twist (obvs kidding!) over a Super Bowl Snickers commercial featuring two mechanics who accidentally kissed. You can watch it here.

But the latest offensive ad, which features Mr. T shooting Snickers bars at a (presumably) gay power-walker to make him run (because "he's a disgrace to the man race" and needs to "run like a real man"), is a little more overtly so. It doesn't help that the slogan is "Get Some Nuts," although I'd argue that's pro-gay.

Anyway, check out this AP story for more details.

Thanks Flocke!

Naomi Campbell's New SoBe Commercial

Here's Noami Campbell's new commercial for SoBe Life Water, plus some behind-the-scenes footage. I'd say it's not as cool (for lack of a better word) as the first SoBe/Campbell commercial collaboration (also, I'm sick of lizards), but I get the feeling I'm turning into a bitter, old pessimist. Judge for yourself.



Thoughts on them using Santana's "Black Magic Woman" as the commercial's soundtrack, BTW? Inappropriate? Or are we past that?

Also, the original SoBe bottle makes for a great gravity bong. Just sayin'.


YouTube via ONTD.

Old Spice Centaur Commercial

Here's a new weird-ass commercial for Old Spice Double Impact body wash, involving a (half man, half horse) centaur, of sorts, and implications of bestiality.



I found it disturbing. Apparently other people didn't.

Funny Trojan Vibrating Touch for Her Commercial

Ha ha ha! Who directed this?



Here's some random product description I found: "Trojan Her Pleasure Vibrating Touch is a small yet powerful fingertip massager providing thrilling vibrations. With a bonus storage pouch and two batteries included (ignore this fragment sentence). Trojan Vibrating Touch is washable and reusable (batteries can be replaced and last up to 30 minutes)."

An Anti-Cigarette Commercial for Stoners

I was just freaked out by one of those anti-tobacco "Truth" commercials. They're taking it too far with the whole animation gimmick.

The commercial I just saw included a disturbing ditty about how smoking can lead to the birth of underweight babies.

Here are some of the lyrics (sung by a cartoon stork):

"Healthy babies are just no fun.
They eat too much and they weigh a ton.
It's really just a shame they have to grow...

They might be small and limp and sickly.
But they’re so cute and extra tickly."

I couldn't find a embedable clip (that worked), so here are some stills.




Also, I addressed only the commercial with my headline, but the entire "The Sunny Side of Truth" Web site seems like it would be more palatable while under the influence of weed.

These guys are there.


Don't bother going to the site though. I wholly encourage you to keep puffing away. More people need to smoke.

Obviously I'm kidding.

Update: Found it!



If given the option, I think I would rather push out a small baby BTW.

And what's up with the gerbil?